


Nothing Comes Easy

by ReginaNocis



Series: I Heard Your Voice in a Dream [2]
Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Eddie Kaspbrak Lives, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak is a Mess, Fix-It, IT Chapter Two Spoilers, M/M, Richie Tozier is a Little Shit, Stanley Uris Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:14:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23552143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReginaNocis/pseuds/ReginaNocis
Summary: “Yes, Eddie, how could you possibly know? You don’t know that he’s been hiding his feelings from you.”Eddie’s heart stopped for one single moment; he knew the only thing Pennywise could be referring to, and he didn’t dare to hope that it was true. By the look on Richie’s face, though, it was a good possibility. Richie looked like he expected Eddie to hit him, or possibly just to leave him to die. Eddie did neither of those things.“Richie, whatever it is, we can get through it together. We can do anything together,” Eddie told him.“Not this,” Richie begged. “Please, not this.”(In which Eddie and Richie go to find their tokens together, and end up finding each other along the way. Set in the same verse as 'Your Courage Gives Me Strength', but can be read separately.)
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh (mentioned), Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris (mentioned), Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Series: I Heard Your Voice in a Dream [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1695019
Comments: 6
Kudos: 106





	Nothing Comes Easy

The clubhouse was exactly the same as they’d left it, even if it contained slightly more dust than before. Nobody had found it, that much was clear. All of them were crowded down there, crouched down to fit where it used to be easy. Beverly kept running her hands along the beams and ceiling, smiling in a way that made Ben stare.

“The hammock!” Richie ran past Stan, throwing himself bodily in the hammock that used to easily hold him and Eddie. Eddie watched fondly as Richie grinned, winking at him. Eddie’s could feel his face flushing, but he was determined as he made his way over to the hammock as well.

“You barely fit,” Eddie pointed out, running his hand along the fabric. Eddie gingerly climbed into it as well, pressed almost fully against Richie, who… Eddie had never seen Richie’s face so red before.

“You’re one to talk,” Richie scoffed, wrapping an arm around Eddie’s legs to hide his shaking hands and obvious embarrassment. Eddie wasn’t fooled for a moment, but he was fairly certain it was just because of the whole situation with Pennywise. They were all tense.

In the time that Eddie was focused on Richie, Stan had managed to grab the tin he’d hidden in the corner of the clubhouse and get out one of the shower caps he’d stored there. Eddie grinned fondly, remembering the day they’d been placed there. He couldn’t hear what Stan and Bill were saying, but he hoped it would lead to them finally getting together.

“Is that it?” Ben asked, walking over to Stan and Bill with his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah,” Stan replied, letting Bill hold onto it for now. He slipped the tin back into it’s place and then went to rejoin the group. “Shall we go find whoever’s is next?”

“I think we should split up,” Bill chimed in. “Eddie and Richie were almost always together, so their tokens are probably in the same area. Mike, you’d be good for helping Bev and Ben, don’t you think? And Stan can help me look.”

“I still think we should be doing this alone,” Mike protested. “We’re more likely to learn what we need to know on our own.”

“We’re more likely to end up getting killed alone, you mean,” Eddie pointed out. “It only attacks when we’re on our own- it’s not strong enough to take us on as a group yet.”

“Just… if it doesn’t work this way, we’ll go on our own, okay?” Ben offered, trying to placate both sides as he always did. Stan didn’t have the patience for any of it.

“I found mine with everyone here. Splitting up is exactly what It wants, so it’s what we’re not going to do. Mike, if you already have your token, you’re welcome to go try to find another solution. Otherwise, stick with Bev and Ben. Richie, I swear to god, you better take this seriously. Do not ditch Eddie just for fun. And Eddie, he just wants to rile you up. Don’t give it to him,” Stan told them all.

There was silence for almost a full minute after he spoke as they all just stared at him. Bill used to be the leader, because he was the one who had lost the most. Now, though, they had all lost exactly the same amount. Bill was quiet and unsure of himself, and everyone waiting for him to make the calls were going to get hurt or killed. Stan, on the other hand, had a lot of anger and motivation driving him towards his goal- killing It as quickly as possible. That made him a damn good candidate for leader of the group.

“Y-you heard him,” Bill finally said, shooing them all towards the exit. Nobody mentioned his stutter, because everyone was still too busy being surprised by Stanley fucking Uris. None of them wanted to think about what might have been happening now if he hadn’t shown up last night at Jade of the Orient.

Eddie stared at his group of friends, the Loser’s Club 27 years later. They were all exactly the same people they’d always been. He couldn’t believe he’d forgotten these people. Bill had bright eyes as he stared at Stanley, and Eddie remembered suddenly a thought that he’d had so many years ago. Those two were always meant to be together. They were, perhaps, the only ones who didn’t seem to realize it. Even Richie was watching them with fond exasperation.

Bev caught his eye from across the room and winked, letting him know that she’d seen it too. Or maybe she was trying to tell him that his crush was equally obvious. She used to call what Richie did to rile him up ‘pulling pigtails’, and just laughed every time Eddie tried to tell her she was wrong. The thing was, Eddie wasn’t always sure she was wrong. Richie spent more time flirting with Eddie than he did with the rest of the Club combined.

“Alright, Billy Boy, you’ve got yourself a deal,” Richie sighed, fighting a smile. Eddie nodded quickly; anything to get out of this clubhouse. It was just as dangerous today as it was when they were kids, not that they’d ever listened to him a single time.

“Good, let’s get going,” Bev replied, hooking her arms through Ben’s and Mike’s. Eddie noted fondly that Ben hadn’t stopped blushing since Stan told them they’d be going together. Even Mike looked slightly pink in the face from the proximity to Beverly Marsh. They were all affected by her, to some degree. Even Eddie, who could admit to himself that he wasn’t the straightest person in the room.

“Seconded,” Richie grinned, moving as if he was going to do the same to Eddie. Eddie knew he wasn’t going to survive the day if Richie was being physically affectionate, so he moved quickly up the ladder and out of the clubhouse before Richie could catch him. He didn’t need to look back to know that Richie was pouting dramatically.

 _It doesn’t mean anything,_ his traitorous mind taunted. He suppressed a sigh as he followed the trio back towards all of their cars. He could feel Richie’s solid presence behind him, but he refused to look back.

Fortunately, they’d taken just the right amount of vehicles. Eddie had originally been riding with Stan, but it was easy to transfer his emergency bag to Richie’s rental car and climb into the passengers seat. The silence was awkward at first, and Eddie fiddled with the radio nervously.

“We could just talk, you know,” Richie told him after he’d flipped the station for the fifth time in less than five minutes. He couldn’t find any songs that he liked.

“What is there to say?” Eddie asked, settling back into his seat. The radio played a soft ballad that Eddie had never heard before.

“Well, I mean… I don’t know anything about you anymore. We forgot each other, and I think I’ve remembered all of our childhood together, but I don’t know anything about adult Eddie. What do you do now? Who did you marry? How’s your mom doing? Bet she misses my company,” Richie shot back, smirking at the end.

“Beep fucking beep,” Eddie grumbled, but his heart wasn’t into it. “I guess… it can’t hurt to talk about it. I work as a risk analyst now, after graduating from Columbia. I got the job pretty much out of college, and I’ve been promoted a few times. I’m their top analyst at the moment. Or… maybe not anymore? I kind of left without giving any notice, and I can’t imagine Myra is going to help my case when they call our home.”

“Damn, Eds,” Richie said softly, grimacing in sympathy.

“Don’t call me that,” Eddie shot back automatically. It was a reflex he’d apparently never outgrown. “I’m not worrying about that right now. We’ve got bigger problems.”

“You could always just come back out to LA with me,” Richie offered hesitantly.

“I can’t just drop everything to live with a friend, Rich,” Eddie sighed. “I’ve still got to deal with a divorce, too. And I’m sure when I explain whatever lie we come up with to my bosses, my job will be fine. But thank you for the offer.”

Richie was oddly quiet for a while. Eddie would take whatever he could get, of course. Silence with Richie was rare. Finally, he seemed to shake himself out of it. “Tell me about Myra?”

“She, uh… well, anything I tell you is just going to set you off with jokes about my mother,” Eddie admitted. Richie shot him an unreadable look, silently begging for the story. “I met Myra in my last year of college, and she- well, to be frank, she’s just like my mother. I couldn’t figure out why I was so drawn to her until I got Mike’s call and all of my memories came crashing back. I basically married my own mother.”

“Damn,” Richie gaped, not even bothering to pretend it didn’t phase him. “And here I thought my life was odd. Only you could do something that fucked up, Eddie Spaghetti.”

“Gee, thanks,” Eddie snapped. Richie’s mouth snapped closed audibly as he pulled into an old parking lot. They were across the street from the Aladdin, where Eddie remembered playing games with Richie until late into the evening. His mother used to be so angry when he came home with no explanation for being late other than losing track of the time. “Why are we here?”

“My token is here,” Richie admitted. “But I think… maybe we should split up for a few minutes, to pick up our tokens. We can meet back here.”

“I think that’s exactly what we’re not supposed to do,” Eddie protested, frowning. Richie wouldn’t meet his eyes, and it was worrying Eddie. “What’s wrong?”

“I just… this is something I need to deal with on my own, okay? And I’m sure you don’t want me there to see your embarrassing token retrieval,” he replied calmly. It was a forced calm, but Eddie had to give him credit for it anyway. “Please, Eddie.”

“Alright, fine. Five minutes, and if you’re not back here I’m coming to get you,” Eddie told him, completely serious. “No matter what, don’t go near the clown.”

“I won’t. Promise,” Richie replied, finally meeting his eyes with a lopsided smile- the one Eddie had always adored. He got out of the car before he could do something humiliating, like kiss his best friend. His _straight_ best friend.

There was never a question of where his token would be; the pharmacy was the only place in town he knew better than his childhood home or the quarry. The inhaler that had never been off of his person _had_ to be his token. There wasn’t any other option that made sense. They were open, thankfully. And he recognized the girl behind the counter at exactly the same time she recognized him.

“Eddie Kaspbrak? I thought for sure when I saw your name on the prescription card this morning that I was seeing things. When did you get back into town?” she asked, grinning slowly.

“Um… this morning,” he told her, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. He hadn’t put in an order for a prescription, which just confirmed his theory.

“Well, hold on. I’ll grab the bag from the back,” she told him, standing from her chair and hurrying away. It was strange to see her not making fun of him for something. It took her less than a minute to come back, holding the bag out to him with a smirk. “Still got that ‘asthma’?” she asked.

“Yeah, you could say that,” he sighed. And here they went.

“You haven’t changed at all,” she sneered. All form of fondness was gone now.

“No, I suppose I haven’t,” he shot back. And then he turned and walked towards the front of the store. He didn’t even make it halfway before he heard his mother’s voice calling him from the door to the cellar. He moved as if he were in a dream, walking down the stairs and remembering the last time he’d heard this voice. He tucked his inhaler into his pocket to keep it safe, though he knew instinctively that It wouldn’t be able to touch the token anyways.

“I know you’re down here,” he called out, proud of his steady voice. Sure, he was terrified, but he was also determined. There was no answer. “You don’t scare me, you know. You’re just… just a clown.”

The sheet across the room rustled, but he planted his feet and didn’t walk over to take the bait. The Leper that had terrorized him as a child shoved the sheet aside and shuffled towards him menacingly. “You’re nothing,” Eddie repeated. The Leper faltered, but continued forward. He didn’t flinch when the creature’s hand reached out for him, just narrowed his eyes angrily. “You’re nothing, and you don’t scare me!”

In a show of rare bravery, Eddie’s own hands wrapped around the Leper’s neck, squeezing tightly in anger. “You’re nothing!” To his surprise, the Leper seemed to shrink in on himself. It had wide, scared eyes as it stared up at him. And then… it disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Eddie would have stuck around to think about what had just happened, but… he realized that if It had left him alone, It would be going after one of the others. “Richie,” he whispered, his eyes wide. He took the stairs up two at a time and ran out onto the street in time to see Richie fleeing the Aladdin and heading for the park.

By the time Eddie caught up, he could see Richie on the ground with the clown looming over him. _“I could tell them. I know what you’re really afraid of, Richie. They’ll leave you when they find out, and then- then you’ll be begging to float.”_

“Richie!” Eddie shouted, gaining both of their attention. If it was even possible, Richie seemed to grow even paler when he saw Eddie. Pennywise, however, sneered at him with undisguised glee.

_“Does he know, Richie? Does he know your secret? No, I don’t think he does. He wouldn’t be here if he did. He’d be disgusted.”_

“Richie, don’t you dare listen to him! I could never be disgusted by you,” Eddie countered, his eyes trained only on Richie himself. Pennywise couldn’t hurt them when they were together. As far as Eddie was concerned, Pennywise couldn’t hurt him at all.

“Eddie,” Richie whispered, his face twisted in agony.

_“Yes, Eddie, how could you possibly know? You don’t know that he’s been hiding his feelings from you.”_

Eddie’s heart stopped for one single moment; he knew the only thing Pennywise could be referring to, and he didn’t dare to hope that it was true. By the look on Richie’s face, though, it was a good possibility. Richie looked like he expected Eddie to hit him, or possibly just to leave him to die. Eddie did neither of those things.

“Richie, whatever it is, we can get through it together. We can do anything together,” Eddie told him.

“Not this,” Richie begged. “Please, not this.”

“There’s nothing to be afraid of,” Eddie promised. He took a deep breath before he continued, forcing himself to remain calm. “Because, Richie, I think I have the same secret that you do.”

Richie’s eyes got impossibly wider. “You’re…”

“Yes, I am,” Eddie told him confidently. “Which is why I know I could never be disgusted by you. He’s just trying to get you to give up. Don’t you dare give up on me, Richie Tozier. I will never forgive you if you leave me alone in this world.”

“Eddie,” Richie gasped, his eyes glistening with tears. Eddie had finally reached him, and he dropped to his knees to pull Richie into a tight hug.

“Don’t you dare listen to that clown. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere,” Eddie whispered to him. “I won’t ever leave you, because I love you.”

“Y-you… you love me?” Richie held him tightly, burying his face into Eddie’s neck. Eddie smiled fondly, letting himself forget that Pennywise was even present. “You mean it?”

“I absolutely mean every word,” Eddie promised. “I think… I think I always have, even when I couldn’t remember you. I watched a few of your shows on YouTube, you know. I never knew why I was so drawn to you, but I remember being incredibly fond of your jokes. You were the only thing that made me laugh for years.”

“You really… you can’t be real,” Richie told him, pulling away to look up at him. Eddie smiled softly, brushing his hair out of his face.

“I’m real, and I’m right here. Now, are you going to tell me your secret?” he replied, keeping his voice soft and warm.

“I’m gay,” Richie said in a rush, as though he wouldn’t be able to say them at all if he didn’t do it now. And maybe that was the case. “I’m gay, and I’m so in love with you that it hurts.”

Eddie didn’t let him overthink it. As soon as Richie finished, Eddie leaned in and kissed him. It was just a chaste press of lips, but it held all of the love that Eddie had been hiding since he was a teenager. Richie was frozen for only a moment before he returned the kiss, making a noise somewhere between a sob and a moan.

As soon as they broke apart, Eddie pulled him back into his arms. When he looked over Richie’s shoulder, Pennywise was gone. “Feel better now?” he asked, stroking Richie’s hair as he cried silently. Richie nodded against him, but made no move to let him go anytime soon.

It was almost an hour later that they finally made it back to Richie’s car to meet up with the others at the hotel. Richie had explained the relevance of the token, and Eddie had shown him the inhaler. They both felt lighter than they had in _years_ , and Eddie was sure it could only get better from here. They were going to kill that fucking clown, and then they’d have the rest of their lives together. Suddenly, moving to LA seemed like the best possible thing he could do.

They were the first to arrive back at the hotel, and Eddie dragged Richie to sit down on the steps leading up to their rooms. He laced their hands together and rested his head on Richie’s shoulder, knowing that it was the best way to keep Richie calm at this point. Richie hadn’t smiled since they’d split up, and Eddie would have been more worried if he didn’t know exactly what was wrong. Richie still didn’t believe this was real.

Bill and Stan were the next to arrive, and the tension between them had only grown stronger. He couldn’t seen any visible sign of a token, but it was probably just small enough to fit into a pocket. They wouldn’t have returned without it, would they?

“Found yours alright?” Eddie asked Bill. Bill simply nodded.

They were saved from further awkward conversation by the arrival of the final group. Ben’s arm was tight around Beverly’s waist, and they were both beaming with happiness. Even Mike, who had not smiled since leaving the restaurant, was clearly happy for them.

“Got yours?” Stan waited for all of them to nod before he spoke again. “Good. We leave in an hour. Grab anything you think could help defeat the clown. We’re going to the Neibolt house, and we’re going to finish this.”

“What- tonight?” Richie demanded, standing and accidentally pulling Eddie up with him. Eddie stumbled against him, but didn’t say a word. “After everything we’ve been through today?”

“Yes,” Stan said simply.

“I… guys, I know what we need to do,” Eddie said softly. His voice was drowned out by both Richie and Mike.

“I can’t believe you shoot down my idea, and then tell us we’re going to die tonight with absolutely no plan at all!” Mike said loudly, anger making his voice shake.

“I am not going to die tonight!” Richie shouted.

Stan let them get their anger out before he raised his hand, commanding silence. Then he turned his full attention to Eddie, who was staring right back in determination. Stan gestured for him to speak.

“I know how to beat It,” Eddie said in a rush, hoping he wouldn’t be interrupted again. “Richie, you… you didn’t see when it attacked me in the basement, but… I almost managed to kill It down there. I wasn’t afraid, or at least- I didn’t let my fear control me. I told It that it couldn’t hurt me, that it was pathetic and… just a clown. And It shrank. It got weak, like it couldn’t fight anymore.”

“Fear gives it power, so of course… of course courage would be it’s weakness!” Bev exclaimed, looking excited.

“We could really do this,” Ben said softly.

“We can win,” Bill agreed, smiling.

“We _will_ win,” Stan corrected.

Eddie had never been more confident that they were right. They would win, and then he’d have the rest of his life to spend loving Richie Tozier.


End file.
